We're Not Having A Party
2004-08-25, 7:38 p.m.

Since the kids agreed that the trampoline purchase would take the place of birthday parties this year, here is what is going to happen so far on Friday night for Daughter.

*3 confirmed sleepover guests so far

*5 bottles of sparkly nail polish

*3 sheets of funky nail appliques

*3 flavors of ice cream for ice cream cake

*1 package of oreos to crumble for cake

*1 tub of Cool Whip to frost cake

*12 glitter candles

*1 new video, "Ella Enchanted"

*5 pizzas, estimated need

*2 big bottles of DECAF soft drinks

*1 package Hello Kitty napkins

*1 package coordinating green plates

*1 ditched little brother, invited to spend Friday night with his best bud

*2 parents who cave in

Not bad for an unparty, whaddaya think?

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We went to Gat-kaCHING-linburg last Saturday evening to treat the kids. Having only enough time to do one "big" activity, we rode the $ky Lift. The $ky Lift is a ski lift, hauling tourists with more money than sense up the side of the mountain and back down again. When you near the top they snap your photo, which you can purchase at an unreasonable price when you disembark to browse the gift shop. After spending $40 for the 4 of us to ride up, we certainly weren't going on a spending spree for Made-In-China Great Smoky Mountains souvenirs. There was one intriguing thing, however, that Son found and enchanted Hubby. A boomerang.

I'm sure most folks come to the Smokies on the quest for a boomerang, so lemme tell you, it's at the $ky Lift gift shop. And it's cheap. It did have a few design flaws that set Hubby and Guru's heads a-spinnin', so Sunday night they played...er, did some designing and calculating and sawing and sanding.

Behold! The perfect boomerang!

It truly does work. It even makes the whistly "vwoo vwoo vwoo" sound they dub on television anytime someone throws one. Hubby just took the kids to the park to toss a few around. As long as no bystanders get concussions, things are good.

If you want one, email me. The guys are gonna take orders. Best Boomerang In The Smokies, get it right here.

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Confession:

A trip to the Smokies just isn't complete without a cheesy souvenir. We have lived here over 7 years now, and I didn't have my bit o'junk yet. Yes, I admit it...I bought the black-bear-screen-printed-micro-beer-stein-toothpick holder. I can die happy now. And they did have some nice stuff up there. Can't say for sure I'd do my Christmas shopping there, but hey, EVERYbody needs a toothpick holder...

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