The Parent Project
2004-09-09, 10:40 a.m.

Last night I finally finished Son's school project. Oh, he contributed, but the burden as per usual fell upon the parents for completion. I had queried other moms, more familiar with this school, and found out such projects are Big Stinkin' Deals where the kids have minimal input. Typical.

Son chose to do a family tree. It only need go back as far as grandparents, but delving further was "highly suggested", as was including media such as old family photos, etc. Rather than simply waste time, effort, and valuable mementos, I made the investment in a good scrapbook. This will be something for Son to keep forever, pieces of him bound in black leatherette. It will be something to ding our budget for the next few weeks. Scrapbooking stuff ain't cheap.

The genealogy part was a no-brainer, thanks to the valiant strides of both my father and mother-in-law over the years. Daddy spent several years researching and collecting photos, which he photocopied and inserted into plastic sleeves in big zippered binders. He included as many facts as he could garner. It's now a priceless gift, a legacy that did not die with him, and I am forever grateful. Mother-in-law is still cataloguing whenever possible, and has hooked up with other researchers who have ferreted out ancestors with astonishing rabidity. One branch of the family has been traced all the way back to Knute (or Canute, depending on which history book you're reading). Come on, fire those neurons...Danish king...the year 900-something. I don't want to know HOW they went back that far with any sense of accuracy. It's just interesting to know.

I included a few pages of family tidbits. Jotting them down brought these relatives more into light as people...not just faded tintypes, not just names on a ship's register, but human beings who loved and struggled and felt and hungered and rejoiced and bled and carried on. Leaving homelands for a strange new world, new languages, new customs, newly reinvented selves. I appreciate what they went through, all they did, to help make us who and what we are today.

There's the great grandfather who quit school after the 3rd grade to work on the family farm. The great-great-great-great grandfather who was a Captain in the fledgling American military and fought alongside Francis Marion. The great grandmother who had the AUDACITY to marry a Yankee, and published a notice in the local paper that it was nobody's business who she chose. Generation after generation of spunk, grit, and tenacity, that makes us today resemble soft shapeless brats in comparison.

Have you ever wondered about nature versus nurture? How many of your traits and outlooks were shaped by your environment, as opposed to your genetics? It's fascinating to see that you have Grandma's nose, Great-Grandpa's sense of humor. Sure we adapt to our surroundings and experiences, but there are some things knitted into our basic structures that have been passed through the ages. It's cool to look at the expanding web of names and realize that so many people had to come together in exactly the right way to produce The Marvelous You.

All these thoughts are lost on Son, who is happy simply to be handing in his project on time. He will spend the majority of his presentation detailing the intricacies of the Zelda characters on the family crest he designed. He will point out the photos of his grandparents, read the information off the page, and fidget in his seat while the other children have their turns in the spotlight. I hope that all the people in that book, and more, will be viewing him from Heaven with bemused approval of the little fella they helped create.

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