Down To Just Two Kids Tonight
2005-04-05, 10:57 p.m.

Hubby jetted today to the land that is �hi� in the middle and round on both ends to partake in some sort of engineery training the rest of this week. I miss him already. I think I�ll leave his socks in the middle of the bedroom floor, where he dropped them yet AGAIN. On second thought, maybe not. Sentiment is one thing, slob mentality is quite another. I�ll just wear one of his t-shirts to bed tonight and try to sleep at least a portion of the night in every square inch of the bed. Nothin� like having a wallow-worthy king-size waterbed all to yourself.

Actually, Hubby doesn�t know how lucky he is to have garnered an escape, as today definitely marks the beginning of a PMS spiel. Daughter remarked at dinner how �grouchy� I am. Of course I had to berate her over how wrong she was just to help her prove her point. It�s not yet at the stage where my kids are bringing me sacrificial offerings of fudge, but it�s getting close. Slay for me a virgin Hershey* bar with almonds and all shall be forgiven.

I don�t have to share the tv, I don�t have to relinquish the remote, so dang if there is anything worth watching tonight. Bummer. 300 channels of unadulterated crap.

Son�s report card arrived in today�s mail with satisfactory marks in all academic concerns, but anything having to do with social skills, manners, organization, and responsibility was in the toilet. He simply tells the adults what we all wish we had the cohunes to do when we were his age. Doesn�t go over too well. Imagine that. I am doing my motherly duty by telling him to just shut up and do his work and everybody will be happy. He doesn�t understand why he has to prove his knowledge to others; that�s when I have to resort to the old chestnut� �Just because.�

Good heavens, Word has �cohunes� in spell check. We have now all been edumacated on the proper spelling of �cohunes�. I wonder what else is in there. Ever type in a bunch of obscenities misspelled to see if they get pegged? Yeah, me neither.

I am having a love/hate relationship with T@rget this week. Love, because they have a wide assortment of really cool stuff. Hate, because they are sold out of everything really cool/quirky/sophomorically fun in my size. No �Ha! Now You Can�t See Me� camouflage tee. No Bob *Ross Happy *Trees tee. No �We�ll get along fine as soon as you people learn to worship me� tee. Yes, I am a tee shirt dweeb, get over it. There is not a single clothing item in the female department that isn�t pastel, and Sally don�t do pastels. I might order a �Zombaid� shirt from Sh@un Of The De@d to soothe my suffering wardrobe and annoy a whole host of soccer moms in town, or confuse them at best.

I have decided to blame my weekend $60+ iTunes download bill on breathtaken1. It was she who posted an entry with a link which led me to the M@ybach website, which made me try to hunt down the hauntingly beautiful music( which is NOT commercially available and made me itch to unearth those responsible and throttle them), which led me to other websites, which led me to CD Baby, which led me to far far too many likeable things, which led to fiscal chaos but some really good cd�s. There you have it, Breathtaken1 to my bank account in six easy steps. Sort of like the Kevin B@con game, only with no alcohol and a debit card.

Stephen King�s �Rose Red� is on and I. Will. Not. Watch. It. Again. Something will go bump in the night with Hubby gone and I�ll be burrowing under the covers screaming like a girl, which is an okay thing I guess seeing as how I AM a girl, but then my children would be scarred for life and would certainly never ever sleep again. Nope, �Rose Red� is out. And now that I�ve begun to spook myself, it�s time for bed. If I don�t update tomorrow, send a search party. Look under the bed or in the closet, that�s most likely where the clowns that eat people have taken me. �Cause we all know that�s what clowns do.

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