It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Wednesday
2005-05-11, 9:10 a.m.

It�s no wonder Hubby and I aren�t losing weight right now. If he keeps cooking like he did last night, we�ll be 350 lbs by the end of summer. He grilled a pork loin and made his favorite homemade honey mustard sauce. He loves to experiment in the kitchen, and sometimes they turn out soooooooooo well.

It�s a lovely bright sunny Wednesday, so what better way to spend it than having friends over and laughing our arses off and generally being obnoxious together? Mrs. Guru and Nursie Friend are coming at 10am for way too much coffee and most likely some chocolate and to watch �It�s A M@d M@d M@d M@d World�, which will be the 3,473rd time for Mrs. Guru and myself and THE VERY FIRST TIME for Nursie. We didn�t know until yesterday that she�s a M@d M@d M@d M@d virgin. That must be resolved.

Thanks to the fabulously talented GroovyGuru, we have Sylvester�s Tiki, and when it no longer wafts creosote it�s coming inside and will have a phone on top.

Every time we watch that movie, Hubby and I dance around the house like Sylvester and his girlfriend for days. Good times, good times.

I am going to be Ethel Merm@n when I grow up.

Daughter has exactly one more week of school. Son has just over a month. Have I mentioned how much I HATE year-round school? I was always a bit wary of it, but now I am a hardened foe. Those lengthy breaks at the end of each 9-week session make it so very hard to get the kids back on task. They get bored. There is nothing to do for three weeks in the middle of winter, unless you are uber-rich and your family owns a resort in Utah and you actually enjoy skiing. Nope, from what we�ve experienced this year, it is far, far better to chug along and keep the pace and then enjoy a nice long summer vacation. Year-round school sucks.

Have you seen the new Run@way Bride doll? Comes with a towel and �Vegas, Baby!� shirt. Looks like she has the Big-Wide-Something�s-Veddy-Wrong-With-Me eyes, too. Anybody else get freaked out over her Big Wide Eyes in all the news photos? Girl ain�t wrapped too tight.

Ever see this? Pretty cool. If only I could get the schools to use it. They are perpetually two minutes fast, which may not sound like much but is an eternity when your child is about to be tardy. Again.

They say the atomic clock is the most accurate time, based on the splitting of radioactive minerals and Periodic Table mumbo jumbo, but I think there�s another, much truer source. The real time can be �pinged� every Sunday at noon according to a small Baptist church somewhere in the rural South. Preacher�s gettin� a little long-winded�lessee�three, two, one, arms with wristwatches UP, sermon�s OVER�*PING* Noon, straight up.

It�s almost 10, straight up, and I need a shower, stat. Toodles!

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