Don't Mess With Texas
2006-02-13, 11:34 a.m.

(Because by using this photo the AP is begging on snark�s bended knee, one simply must oblige to be polite.)

�Dead-eye Dick� Cheney accidentally shot a hunting companion during a Texas quail-hunting trip late Saturday afternoon.

Austin attorney Harry Whittington, employing the maneuver known in hunting circles as �being a damn fool�, failed to report his location while retrieving a quail and meandered into a freshly flushed covey. He consequently was peppered with dignitary-grade bird shot. He is currently in very stable condition at an area hospital and his body is expected to recover well before his dignity. Contrary to earlier press reports, Whittington vehemently denies having made pro-Democrat statements prior to the hunt.

Never to miss an opportunity, Cheney immediately issued a quail-hunting invitation to Ted Kennedy. Kennedy is reported to be hiding under his desk with a fifth of Wild Turkey and has yet to issue a response.

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